One Day to Seventy

Relationships punctuate our lives. Today I will try to examine only three; Those with my grandmothers,  my girlfriends and my sisters.

I had two loving grandmothers. One demonstrated it with hugs, kisses and food. The other demonstrated it with gifts of money and things and food. While grateful for my first piano, beautiful embroidered pieces and home made dandelion wine from the one, I was better served and happier for the physical affection, moral support and peasant food from the other. They both helped shape my style and values and I wouldn't trade them for a million rich grandparents of today. The food tributes also helped shape my body - ugh!

I have never lacked for friends. In my younger days I had my cousins and my best girlfriends, Pat and Diane.

In high school that expanded to include Noel, Phyllis, Jane and others.

In college Sue Mac and Sue S were my roommates and soul mates. They and their future husbands helped shape my music preferences and laid back entertaining style. We have recently re-connected and re-unite yearly for quality "girl time".

In our early married days, we were still friends with the college crowd, but only added superficial neighbors from our community and my dear sorority sister Julie.

Moving back to Chatham I was lucky enough to still have Diane and Pat and, for a while, Lyn Valgenti. Add  Mary Jane, Rita and other neighbors whose names are not memorable at this time.

River Forest brought Carolyn and JoAnne and Mary Lou. And later Geri and Kathy.

In my career I have had so many wonderful friends. To name them would invite trouble, but Jeanne, Dolores, Phyllis, Elizabeth, Glenda , Haydes, Jill, Bernadette, Bernie and Maria M. are my heroes to this day. They made me look good and never had ulterior motives.

Downtown we have beach buddies, Marcia, Mary, Eileen, Diana and a few who have left this earth, most notably, Millie and Nancy. These are summer friends and occasional well being check friends who share our love of beach and water.

The best part is reserved for my sisters. Separated by years in age - we didn't develop close relationships as kids. It was fun to blame EVERYTHING on younger sister Janis as she was too nice to rat on us. Patsy was the good one who never did anything wrong and whom all the aunts loved. Later we lived apart, I was in college when they were not, they served as bridesmaids and godmothers and names on my mailing list as well. It was not until our mother died , that we embraced the joy of our relationship.

As with many families, our mother was the glue that held ours together. When she died, those many years ago, we promised not to let her absence from the world keep us separated. We created "Sisters' Weekend" which we've held every year since Mom's death. We rotate between our homes in Illinois, Cape Cod and the gulf coast of Florida - and make sure the weekend is free from husbands, children and emotional baggage. We have noodled our way down gulf coach beaches, eaten our way across Cape Cod's seafood paradise and peed with laughter across Chicago attractions, including Navy Pier and the top of the Hancock. Lately we've branched out to the Indiana Dunes and the northern beaches of Florida - but the bond is unbroken and we always come away knowing more about each other. Patsy and I have perfected the Cosmo, Jan is our designated driver.

I am also lucky to still have the love and connection to Pat, Diane, Jeanne, Joanne, Mary Lou, Sue Mac , Sue, Mary and Marcia. Lately I am blessed with Martha, Jan, Bonnie and Darlene. These connections bring us full circle in life.

A note to our daughters, nieces, cousins and granddaughters - You will have many relationships in your lives, but cherish those with your sisters, both blood and acquired alike. These are bonds that cannot be broken. Our sons, cousins and grandsons - take heed and try to imitate us. Your life will be richer for it. Sorry, but women do it better and I'm grateful.